Friday, January 24, 2014

We've Been There...and Now We Are Back Again

It time to address a very real concern.  An issue that I know many out there are dealing with and it is not just mine alone.  Something that, the older I get, becomes more and more of a pressing issue.

Yes, I am talking about pee dreams. Please do not let me stand here as though I am the only one who has this happen. But when I am sleeping at night, my dreams will suddenly and inexplicably turn to one subject - peeing.

Frankly, I have decided that I must be Joseph Gordon Leavitt (simply because I cannot stand the thought of my being Leonardo DiCaprio) and I have devised a method to be able to tell myself that I am sleeping and need to wake myself up.

Yes, peeing is my top. The story will change or the location, but with or without an adequate place to do so, I will pee.

And I never get relief. NEVER.

Two minutes later in my dream, I will be in the woods. No relief.

I will end up in a bathroom with a door that doesn't lock and full-length windows.  No relief.

Then, I will go to work and be in the employee break room at the sink.  No relief.

Bellagio Fountains?  No relief.

I think you get the idea.  Look, this is not some deep-seated Freudian concept I am unearthing in myself. No, the bottom line is, once I finally wake up, I really have to go. Really.

That's all my mind is trying to tell myself. "Wake up!!  Wake up before you have relief in your dreams!!"

I am so glad I don't have relief in my dreams. I fear what it would mean.

I am sure Nicki is grateful, too.

Like I said, I am just glad I am not the only one this happens to...I mean, I'm not, right?